What did you learn?

Dear Friends,

Sadly, our One Worship service on August 31 ended early because despite my determination to be the unsinkable Mary Sulerud even though I felt Ill, I got sick anyway to the concern and alarm of all present. Earlier that morning I had received a text letting me know that our deacon, Mimi, was ill and unable to be there. I was feeling poorly, but also perplexed about not showing up, and what to do. Testing negative for both the flu and Corvid, off to church I went.

Last week a member of the congregation asked me this question, “What did you learn?” Well, it is a complex question. I learned that I am hugely afraid of my own vulnerability and letting folks down. (Clergy I suspect have quite a complex about letting people down.) I also felt uneasy about not knowing literally who to call to take the service at 7:30 am when it was already 6:30 am. That’s been resolved, and I now know

who can lead Morning Prayer when we have no clergy, and thus who to text or call.

Perhaps the most important thing I learned was that you care about me as much as I care about you, as well as one another, and that I should trust that as much as I implore you to trust it. In a moment of illness I had fallen into the trap of thinking I was alone, and needed to soldier on, assuming God would get me through it. Sometimes we (I) learn the hard way that is not what God will do, nor should that happen.

There is probably a lot more that will keep bubbling up as learning along the way. A few weeks ago, I shared at a Howard County Clergy Alliance meeting how grateful I was for a congregation that would help see that my husband, who no longer drives, got to church. After the meeting a number of clergy told me how important it was for them to hear that congregations can help their clergy leaders without it being anything other than grace and love. One of the phrases I used to embroider on quilt squares for innumerable cousins as they got married was this, “A burden shared is a burden halved.” Thank you for being wiser than me about when that is true in my own life.

God’s peace and keeping,

Mary+